I’ve been processing that.
I had the idea that I wasn’t going to blog about the event. My last post was an assertion that the training was so successful, the event itself didn’t matter. Which was, of course, my Brain’s sneaky way of pretending I could basically cop out on the actual relay. My Brain was trying to convince both you and I that I had really kept all my promises and done all the work, so we should just kindly avert our eyes in the matter of that last little thang (the actual race that all this was leading to) and that would be great, thank you very much.
In fact, the relay itself was a whole new, hard, scary, complicated adventure that refused to be skipped over, that demanded to be negotiated one step at a time through twenty long hours and one hundred miles. It was a different challenge than I had at any point in the training up until then and it brought different responses out of me.
It’s been nearly a month now. I can’t believe that, where the hell did August go? On the one week anniversary, I relived it all in detail. I can’t tell you how sweet and how profound it is to be in your summer jammies with a glass of wine (I like something white in a frosted glass in the summer) at the same hour you were packed in a van in running gear, bracing for a missed night’s sleep, a string of heavily used port-o-pottos and the running challenge of your life, exactly the week before.
I’ll continue to relive it, to compare the hard thing with being done with the hard thing and not having the hard thing in front of me anymore.
I want to tell you all about it but I’m finding that I’m not able to do that quickly , so I’m going to do it in installments. We’ll launch in next post. In the meantime, check out this awesome podcast (that you can now also read if you prefer) about running as a spiritual practice from On Being (and please do notice that I have left a comment at the bottom there).